There’s a small hole inside

Disclaimer: Long ago (if you, imaginary blog-viewer, would consider three years a long span of time), I thought that beginning my sentences with the pronoun I is a sin, a sign of self-centeredness, because of what a certain friend told me. That it should not be me, me and me. Things like that. So I resolved that as a first step, I would stop using the pronoun I as a word that starts a sentence. As with almost all of my rules, I did break my self-imposed rule. However, I’d tell you that it was rare – rejoice, universe, I actually followed a self-made rule faithfully!

As wordy as my previous paragraph was, that’s not my point. I only wanted to say that, by circumstance or by impulse, I may have to start some sentences with I. And oh, I just did. </disclaimer>

Lately, I’ve been feeling some kinds of emptiness inside me, the type wherein you just need to fill up a hole with something which you can’t identify. Which is frustrating. Anyway, before you think that this is something related to my romantic (mis)adventures, let me tell you that I actually am getting a feeling that this is somehow related to books.

I’ve been envious of my friends (close ones at that) who can name so much book references and can actually recall plots of classic works. As for me, although I know some classic books by heart, my stock knowledge of such is actually less than one might think of me. I only read good, memorable, tear-jerking or laughter-inducing lines and then think that I’m already “in the circle”. Oh, delusions of grandeur. In fact, I haven’t read a lot in the past five years, which coincides with my college life.

If you’re going to ask me? It’s all because of the Net – or more precisely, because I let the Net take away my reading time. Except for reading my school stuff, which is excluded, in a way, because what I’m referring here is reading literature. (But in today’s postmodern society, you never know which is literature, and the lines on which is which are significantly blurred.) Yes, I read intensely in the Net: news articles about anything, sports columns, blogs and other stuff but it’s different when you read an honest-to-goodness printed book.

I was tempted to list financial reasons here but nah, it’s not really a valid excuse when I have creative ways to get my hands on to books. So I’m not including that.

It’s not a hard hole to fill, really.

P.S. I will be posting more experiences here – not just of one kind, as you may have observed. I just hope that I remember all the details because I want to describe the events in a vivid way – not the TMI type, of course. Though I may have to border on that when I write.

P.P.S. I actually drank a glass of warm calamansi juice – straight! Without hesitation and without sugar. Score another for this year full of firsts!


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